Today my sweet son called me his lifesaver. His lifesaver. It was so kind and loving and completely not what I would have called myself. A lifesaver?
Let me tell you, I don’t feel like a lifesaver. I feel more like I am desperately trying to keep my head above water on a sinking ship.
I can sort of wash my hands in the kitchen sink on top of all the dirty dishes piled up in it. My husband doesn’t have any clean underwear left. The pile of dirty clothes is larger than the ginormous pile of clean clothes. My floors need sweeping… and mopping. I am unexpectedly potty training my youngest and spending every 20 minutes in the bathroom with him. Of every day. We’re slipping on a banana peel trying to train a puppy. Our marriage is being refined… and that can be a painful process. Finances are tight. My clothes are tight.
Did I mention I’m nine months pregnant? I have heartburn, I’m exhausted, my crotch feels like it’s on fire, and I am sooo not ready to have a baby. My patience is thin. I cry way too often and I’m not a cryer. I get frustrated often. Oh and school! Homeschooling is stretching me every which way and it can be HARD. I’m in agreement with the kids that I would rather just not do it! And go figure, my kids want to eat every day! 3 times or more a day! We moved to a new state a few months back and are still finding our place in a big, new city. I miss my dear friends from home. All of them.
A glass of wine would be nice right now. Or a donut. Or some Bill Miller’s fried chicken. Or some Fuddrucker’s fries dipped in hot cheese. Or a vacation. By myself. On the beach. For a long time.
Wait….. Where was I?
Oh yeah. Not a lifesaver. More like a big fat emotional mess.
I would throw my hands up and cry but… oh wait. Been there, done that.
Is there hope?
For me. And for you.
Many, many years ago I heard a sermon and although I can’t remember all the details I do remember one key plea that has stuck with me for all these years.
When in a mess pray: “Lord, please bless this mess.”
“Please Lord, take my mess and make it into what glorifies you, what brings honor to you, what portrays your goodness, what you want it to be.”
WE may expect perfection. WE may be in this competition to be the mom who has it all together. WE may think that we have to do it all to be wife-of-the-year.
Listen closely. WE DON’T!
God does NOT expect perfection. Not at all. He welcomes us in, calls us in, pulls us to him… mess and all. MESS AND ALL!!!
Even with my frazzled hair, my smelly kids, my sink full of dishes, my dirty floors, my huge pile of clothes on the floor, God is still lavishing blessings upon me- in abundance.
I am so relieved that God doesn’t demand that we clean up first, that we get it all together, that we have the perfect kids, the perfect marriage, the perfect house before we can come to Him.
No, He invites us to bring the mess with us, to give it to Him, to leave it at His feet, and to rest knowing that He has it all in His perfect hands.
No matter where you are, we can pray together to the Lord, “Lord, please bless this mess”.
Does my laundry still need to be done? Yes. Do my kids need to learn something in the day? Well… yeah. Do I need to do this dishes before my house begins to stink and I have nothing to cook with? Yep.
So how do I work this out?
I allow the grace that only comes from the Lord to cover my heart, to warm my soul, to nourish my bones, to strengthen me, to give me wisdom, to sustain me, to help me achieve what He has for me to do, and to have JOY in doing it. The Lord’s yoke is easy and His burden is light.
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
I am giving it to God. I am trusting in His goodness. I am believing in His truths. I am clinging to His promises.
Do I deserve this grace? Heck no. That’s why it’s called grace. That’s why it’s so beautiful. That’s why it’s so amazing. That’s why it’s so God.
Grace is unmerited favor. Grace is God’s sufficiency. Grace is all we need to accomplish the work set before us. Grace is saving. Grace is what makes us what we are. It is enough. It is more than enough.
Are you a mess? Me too. A big, fat, emotional mess.
Give it to God. Lay it at his feet. Pray and ask God to lighten your load. Ask Him for His grace. Ask Him for His gentle care. Accept His help. Take on His yoke.
I am choosing to handle the stress of my life, God’s way. I am choosing to be completely dependent on God and not on myself. I am choosing to not let my circumstances dictate the level of my joy. I am choosing to not defile the name of the Lord because things are hard. I am choosing to glorify God.
I am giving my mess to God.
The Lord will mold my mess, and your mess, into something beautiful, something God-honoring, something glorious.
He really will.
Believe me, He already is.
Thank you Lord, for blessing this mess…